Time and lack of time come up ALL the time in virtually every conversation.
It’s time.
Not the right time.
Is it time?
Time is money.
Time is just dragging.
Where do I find the time?
He has all the time in the world.
It’s about time.
I’m just killing time.
She wastes so much time.
They don’t respect my time.
Where did the time go?
Why can’t he be on time?
People have very different thoughts and judgments about time but usually they think those thoughts and judgments are just true. Facts.
I have a thought about appointments: “15 minutes early is 10 minutes late.”
It appears no one else that I know has this thought, so along the way I learned that it might not be an incontrovertible fact.
How we “spend” time is very similar to how we “spend” money: everyone has an opinion about the right way or the responsible way to manage both.
Some of us feel the need to spend every penny and fill every minute whether out of anxiety or zest for life.
Others make a point of saving time and money, sometimes out of fear of the future and in other cases to build a compelling future.
The point is that there are far more thoughts about time than there are facts but most of us get very strong emotions about the subject on a daily basis.
How you spend time,
how you think about time,
and how you judge others regarding time are always good areas in which to be curious.
Curious. Not furious.
Any plan, any new idea, any change means a different thought about the way time is being allocated. Most humans are pretty sure they are already allocating their time the only possible way. Or they are pretty sure that they do not have the ability to manage their time in a new way. Both of these thoughts are untrue.
If you recognize that time is a perennial issue in your life, hold off on making sweeping changes. Notice the urge to label yourself as disorganized, lazy, obsessive or broken in any way. You are not doing anything “wrong.” There is nothing to fix.
Just take a little time out and get curious. Not furious.
Our patterns of managing time are created over a lifetime to help us deal with all the many things that have gone on. There is no need to judge those patterns, but if we notice that some of them are no longer serving us, the best way to make a change is with self compassion and fascination.
This week, take a mini Time Out every time you notice that “time” is a trigger for your thoughts and your emotions.
Stay curious. Not furious.