When I was certified as a Life and Weight Coach, I assumed that I would primarily coach people who wanted to transition to a vegan or WFPB (Whole Food Plant Based) diet. I had committed to eating vegan in my mid-50’s after never believing it would be possible for me to give up eating animal products.
Before I committed to eating vegan I considered myself:
Meaning, in my case, that I ate vegan unless I had a good excuse: traveling, a guest at someone’s house or party, the gift of a cake or cookie.
I told myself that if someone else’s feelings might be hurt by my refusing to eat animal products that was a valid “excuse” and I could eat it. I had an excusitarian diet for quite a while until I stopped eating excuses.
As it happens, not one of my current clients is looking for help in committing to a vegan diet. To be sure several of them have chosen to work with me partially because they know I eat vegan, but that is not the focus they are trying to achieve through coaching.
Most of them, however, are excusitarians. We probably all are in one area or another. We have an identity or commitment or a goal and we are all-in except for when there is a good excuse.
I am all for a good excuse and as a Life Coach I am not here to judge your excuses. If you like your excuse, I love it. But if your excuses are standing in the way of your goals, your integrity with yourself, your values or your relationships then coaching can help you see what thoughts and feelings are fueling those excuses.
If an excuse keeps coming up for you as a problem, it’s just a thought you keep telling yourself.
They will be annoyed.
I don’t have enough information.
I work so hard I deserve it.
I’m just trying to get through the week.
It will take too long.
I have a family.
I don’t have a family.
No one is going to take me seriously.
It’s no big deal.
The list of excuses is literally endless. What is your favorite excuse? I have one in particular that I’ve practiced for decades.
My time is not my own.
With that excuse based on years of finding evidence for it as a wife, mother, business owner and property manager I have wasted all kinds of time. Sure I could tackle that project or commit to that goal, but my time is not my own and the minute family/business/property need me I won’t be able to do it and so why bother.
My time is not my own.
I am still a practicing excusitarian when it comes to my writing goals among other things, but at least I’m on to myself. (More about that next week)
Working with a Life Coach is the best way I have found to discover the excuses that are undermining your goals, creating self-doubt, and sabotaging your results.
In the meantime, if you’re a practicing excusitarian, ask yourself what the thought is that comes up repeatedly when you bail out on yourself.
I would, but (your excuse here).
I wanted to but (your excuse here).
Practice noticing the excuses.
I promise you can keep any excuse you consciously decide you want, because an excuse you decide you want is a DECISION.